#MeToo Story Number 29 - By Anon.

Sexual abuse can come from loved ones too.
He was 16, I was 15, we had been in an on and off relationship for a while and I was not ready physically or mentally to have sexual intercourse. He would tell me things like "no boys would ever wait this long for you" or things like " idk if I can stay much longer with you if we don't have sex" or also "if you don't have sex with me you dont really love me or trust me". As a 15 year old girl who was truly in love, hearing those words come out of your first love's mouth it gets in your head and plays with your mind. That same boy even went through my best friends iPad to see all of our texts about me opening up and telling my best friend how much I didn't want to have sex because i wasn't ready. Instead of coming to me telling me he was sorry for pushing me, that same "boyfriend" came to me mad and angry about me opening up to someone who actually listened to what I had to say. One afternoon while I was at my "boyfriends" house we were kissing and he started telling me all those toxic things i mentioned above & much more, he then started manipulating me into having sex. I wasn't strong enough and just said "sure do whatever". And so he did. He took my clothes off and took my virginity. I was in pain. I felt broken. I went home that day and cried silently in my bed all night long. Still to this day I remember and cry. He took something from me that is irreversible. I kept my toxic relationship with him for way longer than i should have because I did actually love him. To this day I feel like I'm the one to blame. Till to this day I can feel his strong arms around me and the pain that he caused me the day he took my virginity. Sexual abuse/rape can come from loved ones. I have forgiven him, I'm still not over what happened and I don't think I'll ever forget the feeling of loneliness, of vulnerability, of pain and how helpless I was because I thought that that was his way of loving me. But it wasn't. This happened almost a year ago. 
I was sexually abused by my boyfriend.
Rapists can be loved ones.
- A survivor of rape